I hope you’re all doing well. Sorry I haven’t blogged in a long time. I’ve been busy writing a new book. Here it is. It’s a dark science fiction comedy set in the South.
Drake Novak is a pale man with bloodshot eyes and a black suit. He owns a plastic factory in a small town in Georgia. The workers don’t know it, but Drake is an alien who feeds on the misery and suffering of other life forms. The factory is his buffet. But Drake’s feeding frenzy is about to end. Malpheus Mallock, a young policeman from the Galactic Precinct, comes to Earth to arrest Drake. Sadly, his tracking device doesn’t work correctly. He lands in the yard of an elderly couple named Carl and Christine who provide him with fried chicken, mashed potatoes, and iced tea. Malpheus struggles to fix his tracking device and find Drake Novak before he destroys the whole town.
If you’re interested, the paperback version is six dollars. The e-book is $2.99. You can click here to order it on Amazon.
I drew a picture of Taylor Swift a few weeks ago. Just now posting it here. Lately, I’ve been busy illustrating a new book. I’m about to upload it to Amazon soon. It’s a science fiction/comedy/horror novella I wrote during Christmas vacation. It’s a short one. And it’s completely and totally ridiculous.
Here’s my drawing of Jimmy Fallon. I drew it back in 2014. I can’t remember if I ever posted it on here. I’m about to finish writing a new science fiction novel/nonsense adventure book. I’m planning to do several pencil illustrations for it and publish it on Amazon. I might share some of the illustrations on here.
Here’s my drawing of Jewel Kilcher from last year. I’ve mostly been writing last year and this year. I’m about to do some more art soon. I hope. Happy New Year.
No, I didn’t mind sitting in the Burger King drive-thru for twenty minutes while you parked next to the speaker box and haggled about prices. Really, it’s fine. It was smart of you to demand a detailed breakdown of the many, many items you ordered. I understand that Burger King isn’t a public place. It’s your restaurant. It was made just for you and your rolling battleship SUV. I should be grateful that you allowed me to come and buy food at your personal hamburger facility. Not only were you kind enough to leave some food for me after you thundered away, you even let me inhale the exhaust fumes from your vehicle while I waited. It was such a lovely aroma, better than a forest after a fresh summer rain. Thank you again for your kindness. It’s so generous of you to share the Burger King drive-thru with the rest of mankind.
I hope you’ve been doing well. Sorry I haven’t been on WordPress much lately. I’m not ignoring you. I’ve just been tied up, cleaning up a couple of my older books and trying to re-promote them. Anyway, a thought just occurred to me while I was sitting here at my desk, watching a Georgia Championship Wrestling clip from 1983. (Please don’t judge me.) Does anyone know how to download videos from YouTube? I don’t want to steal anybody’s material, but I just think it would be nice to keep some of my favorite YouTube gems stored safely on my computer — in case they ever disappear from YouTube, the way they sometimes do. For example, there was an old music video I used to watch all the time. (Southside Johnny singing Walk Away Renee from 1986.) And then one day I went to YouTube to watch it … but it was gone like morning fog. Surely there’s a way you can capture videos and save them on your computer the way you right-click pictures and save them. Any advice? Anyway, have a nice Sunday. Stay warm and dry. Cheers.
Sorry I haven’t been on WordPress much lately. Since I finished the last book, I’ve spent most of my free time cleaning my apartment and throwing a lot of old junk away. I did sit down this weekend and do some drawing. This is a picture of a fictional character named Skink, who appears in some of Carl Hiaasen’s novels. Hope the weather’s good where you live.
My new book is on Amazon now. The Kindle version will be free August 1 – 5. This one isn’t fiction. How to Make an Artist Miserable is a journal/essay/tirade about some of my frustrations as an artist — and how I’ve learned to overcome them. Like people assuming I work on a “for hire” basis and requesting giant portraits of their children, for example. Over the last few years, I’ve actually found a way to deal with those people. I no longer draw pictures I don’t want to draw. It’s very liberating.
You can click here to learn more.