Lost in Germany

We found an auditorium where a heavy metal band was playing. Thick smoke floated above our heads. Red laser beams flashed in the air. People danced with their eyes closed, waving their arms in slow motion, grasping at imaginary objects with their fingers. I watched them with nervous curiosity.

After the show was over, I stumbled into the street with Greg and Jesse. It was time to return to the youth hostel. We walked down a staircase in the sidewalk, into the concrete labyrinth where the subway trains lived. We boarded a train and rode through the tunnel a few minutes. Then we stepped off and climbed another set of stairs.

When we reached the top of the stairs and looked around, we didn’t recognize the signs and buildings around us. We had gotten off at the wrong stop. We didn’t know where we were. It was almost eleven o’clock. And we couldn’t call our teacher on our cell phones because we didn’t have cell phones. It was 1998.

So we rambled through the streets, asking strangers for directions to the youth hostel where we were staying. Most of them were friendly and polite, but they had never heard of the Jump In Youth Hostel. We even found a black taxi cab parked indiscreetly on the sidewalk, a common practice in Germany. The driver sat behind the wheel, sipping coffee and listening to the radio. We eagerly asked him to take us to the Jump In Youth Hostel, but he shook his head and started pointing, giving us directions in German. None of us understood German well enough to know what he was saying. We mumbled “danke” and walked away, disappointed and discouraged.

We walked through the subway and found a group of policemen playing cards in a small, dirty room with pictures of naked women plastered on the walls. We explained our predicament to them. They also gave us helpful directions in German.

***

You’ve been reading an excerpt from How to Make an Artist Miserable. The Kindle version is free May 19-23. The paperback version is $5 plus shipping and handling as always.

You can click here to order a copy.

Copyright 2015, 2017 Matthew David Curry. All rights reserved.

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Solitude

I hate it when people stand behind me, staring down at my paper and invading my personal space. I don’t know how other artists work, but I spend a long time building the basic shape before I flesh out all the little details. If I’m sketching a face, I might spend ten minutes forming the outline of the head and the curves of the hair around it. But if spectators are gathered around me, I feel obligated to hurry up and work faster in order to keep them entertained. This hasty scrambling always leads to a sloppy picture.

People also love to yell out brainless comments as I draw. If I’m drawing a face, for instance, I will loosely sketch the eyes, make some rough marks representing the nose, scribble in the lips, and then return to the top of the face to add detail to the eyes. As soon as I direct my attention to the eyes, some bonehead will blurt out, “You forgot the give her nostrils! She needs nostrils, don’t she? Are you not gonna give her no nostrils?”

They don’t understand that I’m building the picture in layers. They just think I’m forgetting important details, so they like to point at the paper and remind me to add this and that. Sometimes, they’re deliberately being rude. Sometimes, they’re truly ignorant. Whatever their motivation, it drives me insane. If you don’t know what you’re talking about, don’t open your mouth and spew criticism.

This is why I prefer to draw in the privacy of my apartment, spinning a Miles Davis record on my turntable. Or sitting in a cool hotel room, drinking coffee and listening to the soothing music of The Weather Channel.

***

How to Make an Artist Miserable is free on Kindle May 19-23. The paperback version is still $5 plus shipping and handling.

You can click here to order a copy.

(Copyright 2015, 2017 Matthew David Curry. All rights reserved.)

Skink

Sorry I haven’t been on WordPress much lately. Since I finished the last book, I’ve spent most of my free time cleaning my apartment and throwing a lot of old junk away. I did sit down this weekend and do some drawing. This is a picture of a fictional character named Skink, who appears in some of Carl Hiaasen’s novels. Hope the weather’s good where you live.

Alien discovers new toy


Here’s a colored pencil drawing I did a couple of months ago. There’s a real store called “Pay N Tote” in the town where I live. It’s a quaint little place. I’ve wanted to draw it for a long time, but I wanted to throw something strange in it. Hope you’ve been doing well. I’ve been busy working on a new book.

Recent drawing

Here’s a colored pencil drawing of the Doctor (the Peter Capaldi version) fighting with an alien monster.

(I’m not trying to sell it. Just displaying it. I’m still unsure about the idea of selling fan art.)

Tiffany

I spent most of yesterday cleaning and rearranging my apartment, but I sat down afterward and drew in my new sketchbook for a couple of hours. This is a picture of Tiffany, one of the ladies at the Dollar General in my neighborhood. I drew her earlier this year, but I wasn’t completely happy with the way it turned out. I like this one a little bit better. Hope you’re all having a good week.

Delving into my new sketchbook

My sister gave me a new sketchbook for my 35th birthday. Here’s one of the first pictures I’ve drawn in it. This is Anna Keating, the lady in charge of Sound Stage Direct, an online store that I’ve ordered a few records from. It’s fun to do business with her.

I haven’t posted much on here lately because I’ve been busy kicking around ideas for a cartoon strip and working on a new book. The new book isn’t fiction. It’s more like a giant blog post … and therefore, I’ve been pouring most of my “essay energy” into that rather than the blog. Sorry I haven’t been as sociable on Word Press lately. I feel a little bit rotten about that. I hope you’re all doing well. And I hope you have a great Christmas/holiday season.

The Noid

Here’s a pencil drawing I just finished this morning. It’s a picture of the Noid, a character from the Domino’s Pizza commercials back in the 80s. The Noid was a creation of Will Vinton Studios, who also brought us the California Raisins. I was fascinated with the Noid when I was a kid. Still am.